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Simian Practicalist

Thousands of Students Protest against ID Laws

Atlanta, GA – Twenty thousand teenagers skipped school on Tuesday protesting against all ID laws.


“It’s not that I want or don’t want stricter laws for voting,” said Valerie, 16, “I’m not even old enough to vote so I don’t care. But if the Dems want to protest against voter ID laws, then what about my trying to buy cigarettes and booze?! Seriously, they always ask for my ID and I have to find a workaround. It’d be easier to get an abortion.”


Mike, 15, has similar sentiments. “Yeah, once in a while, they don’t check but most of the time, I have to ask my older brother’s friends to buy us cigarettes.”


Since ID is not requested when purchasing lighters, many of the city’s trash cans were set on fire during the school-hours rampage across the city.

 

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