The Real Reason CNN President Zucker Resigned

Atlanta, GA – CNN president Jeff Zucker resigned on Wednesday, reportedly for failing to disclose a consensual relationship with a colleague.

“I am not sure what was so wrong about it,” said Zucker, “after all, it’s the CNN, we’re not supposed to do any meaningful reporting anyway.”

According to a secretary of a senior executive speaking on the condition of anonymity, the board took a different view: “It wasn’t that Jeff had a consensual relationship with a colleague—I mean, at least it was consensual, half the time that’s not even the case—it was the fact that he failed to put some left-wing spin on it.”

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