Toronto, BC – A man has given up on making his prayer spreadsheet after reaching 4,000 rows.
“I’ve been taught to pray generally and just leave it to God as well as to be specific,” he said.
Opting for the latter approach, he started making a spreadsheet when he realized he “kept on forgetting stuff” after he finished praying.
“At first, I tried to list the health issues of my family and friends,” said the man. “That took quite a few rows, but when I got to the world’s problems, the spreadsheet exploded.”
The man tried to break matters down into obvious categories and by geography which was not difficult; Eastern Europe, Syria, Lebanon and Congo were some obvious locations.
“However, when it came to the actual problems and causes, I found myself, in addition to my own faults, listing the names of every liberalist priest, deep-state idiot, banker or zionist lackey,” said the man, “so I just gave up at that point and mostly went back to the first option.”

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