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![Girl Confused after Suspension for Drawing Penises Everywhere](https://static.wixstatic.com/media/846630_c2110c747c9b406f98df3ed15e907393~mv2.jpg/v1/fill/w_300,h_225,fp_0.50_0.50,q_90,enc_auto/846630_c2110c747c9b406f98df3ed15e907393~mv2.webp)
Dec 24, 20231 min read
Girl Confused after Suspension for Drawing Penises Everywhere
San Francisco, CA – A student at Wakeham High School is confused after being suspended for drawing penises all over the school as well as...
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![Southwest Presbyterian Church to Grant Extra Seating Room](https://static.wixstatic.com/media/nsplsh_5a77617169635a4f416763~mv2_d_4928_3264_s_4_2.jpg/v1/fill/w_300,h_225,fp_0.50_0.50,q_90,enc_auto/nsplsh_5a77617169635a4f416763~mv2_d_4928_3264_s_4_2.webp)
Dec 18, 20231 min read
Southwest Presbyterian Church to Grant Extra Seating Room
Dallas, TX – Southwest Presbyterian Church has made amendments to its seating arrangement policy. “Typically, our ushers will make sure...
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![Senate Staffer Fired for What Government Is Usually Doing](https://static.wixstatic.com/media/nsplsh_d23cc4a909be4827b8bac3038fa3f728~mv2.jpg/v1/fill/w_300,h_225,fp_0.50_0.50,q_90,enc_auto/nsplsh_d23cc4a909be4827b8bac3038fa3f728~mv2.webp)
Dec 17, 20231 min read
Senate Staffer Fired for What Government Is Usually Doing
Washington DC – A 24-year-old man, staffer of Democratic Senator Ben Cardin, has been terminated after footage of him engaging in anal...
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![Experts: Today, White Lung Syndrome; Tomorrow, White People Syndrome](https://static.wixstatic.com/media/nsplsh_7043717a4d653034733867~mv2_d_10800_7200_s_4_2.jpg/v1/fill/w_300,h_225,fp_0.50_0.50,q_90,enc_auto/nsplsh_7043717a4d653034733867~mv2_d_10800_7200_s_4_2.webp)
Dec 13, 20231 min read
Experts: Today, White Lung Syndrome; Tomorrow, White People Syndrome
Atlanta, GA – Given the recently reported outbreak of white lung syndrome in China, experts are warning about the next pandemic. “I know...
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![UN: Alderaan “on the brink of full-blown collapse”](https://static.wixstatic.com/media/846630_5f81a8c0de52459b9b299e1f0fb08244~mv2.jpg/v1/fill/w_300,h_225,fp_0.50_0.50,q_90,enc_auto/846630_5f81a8c0de52459b9b299e1f0fb08244~mv2.webp)
Dec 12, 20231 min read
UN: Alderaan “on the brink of full-blown collapse”
New York City, NY – Alderaan is “on the brink of full-blown collapse” with civil order breaking down, according to the UN. It has been 66...
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![Previously Secret Documents Reveal New Frigate Doesn’t Have to Float](https://static.wixstatic.com/media/846630_cc0a0aac999941b48b1be0843fe5da47~mv2.jpg/v1/fill/w_300,h_225,fp_0.50_0.50,q_90,enc_auto/846630_cc0a0aac999941b48b1be0843fe5da47~mv2.webp)
Dec 8, 20231 min read
Previously Secret Documents Reveal New Frigate Doesn’t Have to Float
Canberra, Australia – According to previously secret documents just released to parliament regarding the $45 billion frigate program, the...
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![Australia Years Behind Realizing They’re Years Behind in Mathematics](https://static.wixstatic.com/media/11062b_164f6e4e601647758be55ca317ab4584~mv2.jpeg/v1/fill/w_300,h_225,fp_0.50_0.50,q_90,enc_auto/11062b_164f6e4e601647758be55ca317ab4584~mv2.webp)
Dec 5, 20231 min read
Australia Years Behind Realizing They’re Years Behind in Mathematics
Melbourne, Australia – According to the latest OECD Program for International Student Assessment (PISA) results, Australian high school...
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![Lucifer Shouted “I Can’t Breathe” During Arrest](https://static.wixstatic.com/media/846630_0d43e8db0f7841c89b24b77d996e1417~mv2.jpg/v1/fill/w_300,h_225,fp_0.50_0.50,q_90,enc_auto/846630_0d43e8db0f7841c89b24b77d996e1417~mv2.webp)
Dec 3, 20231 min read
Lucifer Shouted “I Can’t Breathe” During Arrest
St Michael’s, MN – Scholars from the American Liberal Theologians Association have issued a paper that the rebelling angel Lucifer...
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![Boy Stops Packing Up Lego, Claims It Is Gaza](https://static.wixstatic.com/media/846630_63d19520665a4efe9f4f01a9f448355e~mv2.jpg/v1/fill/w_300,h_225,fp_0.50_0.50,q_90,enc_auto/846630_63d19520665a4efe9f4f01a9f448355e~mv2.webp)
Nov 23, 20231 min read
Boy Stops Packing Up Lego, Claims It Is Gaza
San Francisco, CA – Mrs Tanaka was baffled that his son Shin, 10, no longer packs up his Lego. “He is usually very disciplined,” said Mrs...
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![New Electric Vehicle “Evangelion” to Enter Market](https://static.wixstatic.com/media/846630_9026d81758c2484c8724466e66cfef99~mv2.jpg/v1/fill/w_300,h_225,fp_0.50_0.50,q_90,enc_auto/846630_9026d81758c2484c8724466e66cfef99~mv2.webp)
Nov 13, 20231 min read
New Electric Vehicle “Evangelion” to Enter Market
Austin, TX – A new electric vehicle manufacturer has entered the market. Intended to compete with Tesla, Genesis will release their first...
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![Man Realizes Presbyterian Woman a Snob after Blind Date](https://static.wixstatic.com/media/11062b_90996203f69c4aa88235ff7c20d8a9ab~mv2.jpg/v1/fill/w_300,h_225,fp_0.50_0.50,q_90,enc_auto/11062b_90996203f69c4aa88235ff7c20d8a9ab~mv2.webp)
Nov 13, 20231 min read
Man Realizes Presbyterian Woman a Snob after Blind Date
Melbourne, Australia – A man has realized that the woman his friends had set him up with is a snob after all. “I’ve met quite a few...
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![Pro-Choice Woman Says Palestinians Not Allowed to Kill Babies, Only We Are](https://static.wixstatic.com/media/nsplsh_b615325054c544839ee3101cb4acf691~mv2.jpg/v1/fill/w_300,h_225,fp_0.50_0.50,q_90,enc_auto/nsplsh_b615325054c544839ee3101cb4acf691~mv2.webp)
Nov 10, 20231 min read
Pro-Choice Woman Says Palestinians Not Allowed to Kill Babies, Only We Are
Columbus, OH – Bonnie is celebrating as Ohio voted to enshrine abortion rights in its constitution. “I’m so happy,” said Bonnie,...
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![Senator Bibble: Optus Outage Signals Droid Invasion](https://static.wixstatic.com/media/846630_6442955cad144f57aa3e8c4ea8962dea~mv2.jpg/v1/fill/w_300,h_225,fp_0.50_0.50,q_90,enc_auto/846630_6442955cad144f57aa3e8c4ea8962dea~mv2.webp)
Nov 8, 20231 min read
Senator Bibble: Optus Outage Signals Droid Invasion
Melbourne, Australia – Optus is still trying to determine the cause of today’s nation-wide outage of its mobile phone network and...
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![Jedi Master Who Wanted “Harsher Lockdown Policy” Asks for Forgiveness](https://static.wixstatic.com/media/846630_fce9907a5d8b4fcc859edabcb96940f7~mv2.jpg/v1/fill/w_300,h_225,fp_0.50_0.50,q_90,enc_auto/846630_fce9907a5d8b4fcc859edabcb96940f7~mv2.webp)
Oct 30, 20231 min read
Jedi Master Who Wanted “Harsher Lockdown Policy” Asks for Forgiveness
Galactic Senate, Coruscant (GNS) – Jedi Master Anakin Skywalker appeared on a recent episode of Real Time with Jar Jar Binks alongside...
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![Palpatine Did Not See “Confirmed Pictures of Jedi Beheading Children”](https://static.wixstatic.com/media/846630_8cfa1dd636ea4b879da83b8ea69308c6~mv2.jpg/v1/fill/w_300,h_225,fp_0.50_0.50,q_90,enc_auto/846630_8cfa1dd636ea4b879da83b8ea69308c6~mv2.webp)
Oct 16, 20231 min read
Palpatine Did Not See “Confirmed Pictures of Jedi Beheading Children”
Galactic Senate, Coruscant (GNS) – Chancellor Palpatine said on Wednesday that he had seen “confirmed pictures of Jedi beheading...
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![Empire Calls for Civilians to Leave Alderaan](https://static.wixstatic.com/media/846630_c3cedd2279f345b8b678c7ff154e0b06~mv2.jpg/v1/fill/w_300,h_225,fp_0.50_0.50,q_90,enc_auto/846630_c3cedd2279f345b8b678c7ff154e0b06~mv2.webp)
Oct 13, 20231 min read
Empire Calls for Civilians to Leave Alderaan
Galactic Senate, Coruscant (GNS) – The Imperial Armed Forces on Friday called for all civilians of Alderaan, more than 2 billion people,...
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![Yes-Man to Vote Yes in the Voice and Everything Else](https://static.wixstatic.com/media/11062b_557462ab123440368447ab18a66043e5~mv2.jpg/v1/fill/w_300,h_225,fp_0.50_0.50,q_90,enc_auto/11062b_557462ab123440368447ab18a66043e5~mv2.webp)
Oct 12, 20231 min read
Yes-Man to Vote Yes in the Voice and Everything Else
Sydney, Australia – Joe White-Collier, a 36-year-old office worker, will vote Yes in the upcoming historic Australian Indigenous Voice...
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![Exclusive: Commander the German Shepherd Abused?](https://static.wixstatic.com/media/846630_c1b81ef925844af495cb28e3e9cfc272~mv2.jpg/v1/fill/w_300,h_225,fp_0.50_0.50,q_90,enc_auto/846630_c1b81ef925844af495cb28e3e9cfc272~mv2.webp)
Oct 8, 20231 min read
Exclusive: Commander the German Shepherd Abused?
Washington DC – One week after Commander the German Shepherd was removed from the White House due to multiple biting “incidents”,...
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![Man Excommunicated for Pulling Fire Alarm to Stop Long Church Service](https://static.wixstatic.com/media/nsplsh_666163685f656633595555~mv2_d_3502_5581_s_4_2.jpg/v1/fill/w_300,h_225,fp_0.50_0.50,q_90,enc_auto/nsplsh_666163685f656633595555~mv2_d_3502_5581_s_4_2.webp)
Oct 3, 20231 min read
Man Excommunicated for Pulling Fire Alarm to Stop Long Church Service
St Paul, MN – Re-re-reformed Lutheran Church has excommunicated a man for pulling the fire alarm during the sermon. “We try to be...
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![Latest Study Brings Good News to Vaccinated Women](https://static.wixstatic.com/media/11062b_45c9088ad8f44085be56db68923b73d8~mv2.jpg/v1/fill/w_300,h_225,fp_0.50_0.50,q_90,enc_auto/11062b_45c9088ad8f44085be56db68923b73d8~mv2.webp)
Oct 3, 20231 min read
Latest Study Brings Good News to Vaccinated Women
Given no few studies have been published regarding unexpected vaginal bleeding in women after receiving mRNA vaccines, Feiser Research...
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![My First Battle Against Russians](https://static.wixstatic.com/media/846630_680bd0ef80324ab19e40d1f6311b857a~mv2.jpg/v1/fill/w_300,h_225,fp_0.50_0.50,q_90,enc_auto/846630_680bd0ef80324ab19e40d1f6311b857a~mv2.webp)
Sep 27, 20232 min read
My First Battle Against Russians
Los Angeles, CA – From the company that brought “My First False Flag Government Building Storming” now comes “My First Battle Against...
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