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Spain Willing to Mediate for India and Pakistan, Will Bring Refreshments
Sevilla, Spain – Global powers have called for restraint and de-escalation as the military of India and Pakistan slug it out. “Let’s be...
May 91 min read


Country that Demolished Nuclear Power Plants Wonders Why It Has Power Outage
Officials of Spain and Portugal are baffled as to why they suffered massive power outages on Monday. “I am pretty sure it had nothing to...
Apr 301 min read


TSA Fears Purge Will Compromise Groping
Springfield, VA – A number of mid- and high-level staff at the Transportation Security Administration (TSA) are “concerned that they may...
Apr 111 min read


Australian Election: Guy Who Falls off Stage vs Ex-Cop Who Kicks Ball at Your Head
Sydney, Australia – With less than a month until the Australian Federal Election, Aussies’ choices have been complicated by recent...
Apr 51 min read


Man Gives Up on Making Prayer Spreadsheet
Toronto, BC – A man has given up on making his prayer spreadsheet after reaching 4,000 rows. “I’ve been taught to pray generally and just...
Mar 281 min read


Man against Bud Light Boycott is OK with Destroying Teslas
Las Vegas, NV – A man who riled against “right-wingers” boycotting Bud Light has decided that it is perfectly acceptable to destroy Tesla...
Mar 231 min read


Will Boeing F-47’s Weapons Bay Doors Fall Off?
Arlington, VA – President Trump announced on Friday that the development and manufacture of the Next Generation Air Dominance (NGAD)...
Mar 221 min read


Trump Talks of “Domain Expansion”
Washington DC – President Trump has once again expressed his desire to do a “domain expansion” that will envelop Canada. “I love Canada,...
Mar 151 min read


Alliance “Calls a Meeting” without Its Biggest Member
Paris, France – Just like every other corporate entity, NATO has called a meeting regarding the dire situation in Ukraine. However, the...
Mar 111 min read


Country without a Meaningful Win in War in Ages Threatens Russia
Paris, France – French President Emmanuel Macron, realizing that the US may not be interested in fighting in Europe, thinks France should...
Mar 61 min read


FBI Renamed to “File-Burning Idiots”
Washington DC – Less than 24 hours after the appointment of David Duchnovy as Denise Bryson to the position of FBI Assistant Director ,...
Feb 281 min read


Trump Appoints David Duchovny as FBI Assistant Director
Washington DC – In addition to the negative comments regarding Kash Patel’s recent confirmation as FBI Director, a new wave of bitching...
Feb 271 min read


Country that Shutdown Nuclear Power Plants Wants Nuclear Weapons
Berlin, Germany – Germany’s next chancellor Friedrich Merz has floated the idea of maybe sorta acquiring nuclear weapons. “We’ve been...
Feb 251 min read


Chickens: Latest Avian Flu “Totally Racist”
Atlanta, GA – Chickens across the USA have protested that the latest “avian flu” floating around is “totally racist”. “Seriously, I don’t...
Feb 201 min read


We Need 1.5m Soldiers, Says Man Who Just Got 1.5m Soldiers Killed or Wounded
München, Germany – An illegitimate president demanded funds for an army of 1.5 million soldiers. “We asked to be part of NATO and it...
Feb 191 min read


Man Attaches Vacuum Cleaners to EV to Increase Noise Level
Melbourne, Australia – After being brutally teased by his mates that his electric vehicle is too quiet, a man has attached five new...
Feb 151 min read


Palpatine Renames Alderaan to “Gulf of It’s Just Space and Rocks Now”
Galactic Senate, Coruscant (GNS) – Imperial Maps has updated Alderaan to “Gulf of It’s Just Space and Rocks Now” after Emperor Palpatine...
Feb 111 min read


Deep State Hoping the Chiefs’ Playbook Will Help Turn Things Around
Washington DC – Barely two weeks after President Trump has re-taken office, the deep state is desperate to turn things around. Realizing...
Feb 91 min read


Trump Revokes Security Clearance of Dead Guy
Washington DC – In an unprecedented move, President Trump will be revoking the security clearance of a dead guy. “I know dead people...
Feb 71 min read


Palpatine Dismisses and Recalls All Jedi
Galactic Senate, Coruscant (GNS) – Newly crowned emperor Palpatine is recalling all remaining Jedi throughout the galaxy. Palpatine had...
Feb 51 min read


Pentagon Expelling Outlets “Against Public Interest”, Says Outlets That Act Against Public Interest
Washington DC – In response to the latest memo outlining the rotation of media outlets through the Pentagon, outgoing media parties have...
Feb 31 min read
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